Septmber 10, 2011
For starters, well, let me introduce myself.
Hi! I am David. My common nickname is David, but others call me “Dave”, “Vid”, “Dabid”, “Badong”. I prefer being called by my first name: David.
David means “A Man After God’s Own Heart” and Jonathan means “Beloved, Gift of God”. Let me share three thing about myself before I explain why I decided to start this web-log.
First things first. I am a Christian. I’ve accepted Jesus as my personal Lord and Saviour on the year 2002 during a youth camp and ever since that day, God has captivated my heart. I am in a living and intimate relationship with my Creator. This is not about religion. This is about a living relationship with Jesus. One of these days, I’ll be posting my personal testimony, but for now, I’d like you to know that everything that I will post here are based on my daily walk with my Saviour and the lessons I get from them.
Secondly, I am an engineering graduate whose passion is to develop quality software and programs that will make our world a better place. I am looking forward to the day when I would be in a position to develop software to help the less marginalized sectors of society. I love to serve people especially those who really needs help. My passion for computers and for service has birthed in me a purpose for my career.
Also, the Lord knows how much passion I have for the arts. I love to sing and act. “I’d” love to dance. I like photography and video production. I seem to like clay molding. I don’t like crafts though. When I’m inspired, I enjoy writing. During the past years, there’s a lot of things that passed through my mind that I wanted to write about, but all I ever did was write them in a note. Waiting. A long list of Ideas just there waiting. I hope this blog site will make them a reality 🙂
Lastly, I am a silent (shy) person. Those who know me, see me as an outgoing, noisy, and energetic person. I always smile. I always talk and joke around. But only a few people truly know that I am a silent and reserved person. Most people I know would oppose this sincere claim. One thing about me is that I don’t like getting too persona — talking about my life in detail. I’d rather speak to a multitude than talk to someone alone. That just scares me. I’d rather write to someone, than tell him/her directly what I want to say.
I just remembered a perfect example. The very first time I shared the Gospel to a person was in front of a computer. I shared Jesus and His love on chat, prayed for the person on chat, and by His Incredibly Amazing Grace, the person on the other side of the computer responded (well, at least in typewritten words). Funny but that’s me — often seen in the frontlines, but very reserved on personal matters 🙂
And so in this blog, I will tell you who I am, my secrets, my view on things, my goals in life, my past trials, and everything that passes through my mind, NOT for SELF-GAIN and VAIN-GLORY, but all for the Glory of God.
NOTE: This might look like a confession log. By confessions I mean the things I cannot say out loud, I’ll write.
To tell you the truth, the reason I started this blog is for others to see the other sides of me, because in general, I think they don’t. Oftentimes, I am flattered by how other people see me. I’m often referred by others as an example, an inspiration, excellent, intelligent, and a lot more positive impressions. People look up to me. They CALL ME a Good Boy, a Gentleman, a Leader, a Servant. Make no mistake about it. I love these complements and I thank God on how He’s been using me to make an impact on the lives of others. However, I just want to reveal the man behind these complements. The man who has learned to put on a defense mechanism against the high expectations people have on me. Born on a Christian Family. A Pastor’s Kid. Went to a Christian School. Literally grew up on church. As much as i want to take credit for everything, I am just the same as anybody else. I Fail. I sin. I’ve also been enslaved to sin. I lie. I hate. I cry. I steal. I feel depressed. I have suicidal thoughts. I’m a Human. This is the reason i love the song “A Warrior is a Child” by Gary Valenciano. Deep inside this armor, a warrior is a child. A great a song, great lyrics and perfectly describes me.
Where am i getting at? All these years, I’ve been living on other’s expectations towards me [my parents, my family, my friends, my teachers], but have missed out on the greatest expectation of all — God’s expectation. Sure, all of these names are also what God wants me to be, but what has been wrong all along is that I’ve been doing this for others to see and not for God. That’s one honest statement right there. That is why i call them MASKS. They make me look good in the sight of others, but in the eyes of God, all He sees is a selfish and proud man in me.
With all these revelations, stories, and confessions that I will articulate, all I want, is that you will have a different view of me. Don’t look at me as a man blessed by God to be GOOD. Just like you, look at me as a failure story that God made beautiful. In fact we are beautiful deep inside. I fall down and get hurt also, but God has been faithful to bring me up again. Faithful as in giving me the grace and the push to decide to stand up. I still fall. I still fail. I’m not made perfect you know. You and I are the same. But I made a choice to surrender my masks to God and let Him CALL ME names, not other people. You can do that too. My life is just a result of the challenging walk I have with my Savior. All a result of His Grace as I have a living and intimate relationship with Jesus.
I choose to change my mindset, that only by God’s Grace, Mercy, and Faithfulness, others will not see my MASKS, but they will SEE JESUS IN ME.
“To them God has chosen to make known among the Gentiles the glorious riches of this mystery, which is CHRIST IN YOU, THE HOPE OF GLORY.” Colossians 1:27